December 31st. Turkey comas are beginning to fade and the new year is creeping up on us faster than a child waking up on Christmas morning. You can feel it in the air. There is a renewed brightness to our eyes and a hop in our steps. We can see the people we want to be suddenly standing closer to our grasp. Obstacles seem smaller and our will is stronger. We have hope.
Over the holidays, I spent some time with my cousin. He revealed to me that advice I had given him years prior had really resounded with him. I realized that the advice was still relevant to my own life, especially during a time of the year so focused on mindfulness. I also thought if my cousin had found this simple concept impactful then perhaps it would be worth sharing my thoughts with you guys!
Here was my advice:
You have to be happy with yourself.
1.To be happy with yourself, you need to like yourself. People will disappoint you, and that is okay. Everyone is trying their best. You cannot control how others act, but you have complete control over the person you are. At the end of the day, you have you and all the little quirks that make you special. The world may not always notice your uniqueness, but you know it and that is what is important. Take note of the areas you can improve in but ensure you fully give yourself the recognition you deserve.
2. Don’t compare yourself to others. I hear it all the time and it is something I still constantly need to be mindful of. There is always going to be someone who is more smart, pretty, funny, athletic, creative and talented than you are. However, just because that person exists, does not mean your accomplishments are any less valid. Be happy where you are and doing what you are doing.
3. Be able to spend some time alone and be comfortable. I think it is healthy to take some time by yourself and get to know the person you are. Don’t get me wrong, I love spending time with my wonderful family, friends and boyfriend! I would definitely not recommend isolation or being antisocial, but I do think having a little down time understanding yourself is important. Furthermore, I believe being able to have a strong sense of self allows you to have even more fulfilling relationships. In the world we live in, spending time alone is a bit of a taboo ( personified as a crazy cat lady). We have this huge fear as a society of being by ourselves. However, if you are really happy with yourself, and love the person you are, then this fear becomes a lot less scary. There have been times in my life where I have felt lonely and this realization really helped me. When you are afraid of being alone, you give that fear power. But if you can face it head on and understand it just means spending time with yourself, the fear of being alone holds a lot less power.
Though the whole “new year, new me” idea may be a bit cliche, I do think hope is extraordinarily powerful. New beginnings are very exciting and I cannot wait to see what will happen in the New Year!
Cheers to 2018!